Let me start off this blog entry by announcing that I am officially labelling this word as my “term of the year 2017”.
Some of my friends might smile in amusement reading this now, knowing exactly what I am talking about (which is not surprising due to the fact that I have talked to them about having high expectations A. LOT. throughout the past year. To some of them maybe already in 2016… or the year before that… I beg your pardon for that). It has therefore already happened to me, on several occasions, that my friends have told me: Isabelle, you should keep your expectations low.
My quick response would always be an admitting and semi-desperate: I know, I know!
I’m very aware of the fact that having high expectations is one of my biggest weaknesses since I tend to have them for somewhat everything. Or at least: everything that I like.
Let me explain:
I’ll be completely honest with you: the thing I am probably most guilty of is having extremely high expectations when it comes to my love life. There it is. Anyone else? Please raise your hands so I don’t feel like this is a solo boat ride. So, high expectations in your love life. What does that mean Isabelle? Are you waiting for the knight in shining armour like a Disney princess? Waiting to be chosen by a handsome dude, to be kissed awake from your boring single life?
The opposite is actually the case. When I liked someone I always tended (and still do) to obsess over that person like a crazy teenage girl out of an American movie and eventually take actions myself should I feel there is no progression in our relationship. So now you might think, but Isabelle, that’s good! You’re taking things into your own hands, not waiting around passively until something happens. Yeah well, you see, this would indeed be great if in the end, things turned out the way I had expected them to turn out.
Yes, I am acquainted with being turned down. No big deal, at least I tried so I can move on. Unfortunately, this phenomenon doesn’t confine itself to this one aspect of life. Oh no, that’d be too easy. Like I said, this weakness concerns a lot of the things that I like or that I care about a lot, including Christmas time (big one!), my professional life, goals and plans.
Christmas being my favorite season of the year (oh, the romance!), I always expect it to be a time where I spend time with my family, all of us being in a super jolly mood. Now that I’m a 24-year-old young woman though, looking back it seems that Christmas has always been a time where all of us get along least!
Strangely enough I am never struggling with high expectations when it comes to traveling, crazy right, since I love to travel so much? I think this is due to the fact that knowing that I’m going on another journey gives me a certain peace of mind. Although I don’t know what is lying ahead, I somehow feel reassured that it will be a great and rewarding time, so I am not actively hoping for it to turn out a certain way (For this you have to adopt a relaxed attitude though which comes over time. In the beginning, I too stressed over visiting as many sightseeing spots as possible which ultimately resulted in unmet expectations for my holiday).
Now that we have cheek kissed 2018, I find myself creating so many plans for the upcoming year that it sometimes feels overwhelming. Plans concerning my career, my personal development (both physical and emotional), travel plans, new projects that I want to dive into or want to keep pursuing… I find myself with a lot of aspirations and of course… expectations. Expectations concerning particular projects and persons.
So in my first blog entry of 2018 I want to write this reminder for myself (and maybe for some of you) that I should focus on taking small steps instead of on the big final goal, the outcome (ohoh, I’m such a pro at constructing multitudes of theoretical outcomes inside my head!). To concentrate more on really getting to know someone, on building friendships, on setting small goals for myself so I can gradually and slowly work towards a bigger purpose.
Are you with me? If so then I can’t wait to share with you the experiences
this new year will bring and keep you updated about achievements
and failures! Because I’m human and I fail sometimes.
A very happy 2018!